My writing 'process'

Typical day of writing for Craig Alanson:

6-7AM Get up to walk dogs before it gets too hot. While walking, think of scenes to write today

7-9AM Breakfast, shower, edit previous day's writing

9AM Sit down to write, with notes and voice memos from this morning, last night and yesterday

9:07AM Finish writing all the scenes I had planned

9:08AM Try to think up ideas for scenes to write

9:32AM Browse Amazon to look for writers who are much, much better than me, which is all of them.

9:37AM Including the guy who published a book about clipping his toenails. Actually, it is a trilogy.

9:48AM Wonder why I ever thought I could write a book

10:05AM Self-pity

10:22AM Self-loathing

11AM Have incredibly clever idea for putting Merry Band of Pirates in impossible situation

11:12AM Finish writing scene that puts Merry Band of Pirates in impossible situation

11:23AM How the F&*% am I going to get the Merry Band of Pirates out of this mess? It's impossible!

11:58AM Brainstorm! Have idea to get the Merry Band of Pirates out of impossible situation.

12:11PM Make incredibly delicious Fluffernutter sandwich, eat it

12:29PM Realize "idea" is to have Gandalf from Lord of the Rings rescue the Merry Band of Pirates

12:30PM Consider other ideas

12:53PM Consider writing to JRR Tolkien's estate for permission to use Gandalf as an ExForce character

1:18PM Despair

1:24PM Utter, abject despair

1:45PM The Pit of Despair from 'Princess Bride' is looking like a nice place compared to where I am now

1:52PM Look to bourbon bottle for ideas

1:53PM Bourbon bottle says I am an idiot and should never, never try to write again

1:55PM Finally an idea! I will pour a shot of rum into the Fluff jar to make 'Flumm'.

1:56PM Need an idea related to the book I am writing

2:05PM Consider applying for a real job because I clearly can't write

2:06PM Reject idea of finding a real job because no one would hire such an idiot

2:24PM Take dog for another walk

2:41PM Get idea for scene to write

2:42PM Lose track of dog while attempting to write notes on phone

2:43PM Panic

2:44PM Drop phone, note gets erased

3:02PM Return home, dog is on front porch waiting for me

3:17PM Have new idea, since I already forgot the idea I had while walking the dog.

3:33PM Finally sit down to write something, anything.

4:08PM Goal wordcount for the day: 4,000. Actual wordcount: 4192. Yay!

4:09PM Celebrate that today was SO much better than yesterday

Craig Alanson